Unexpected Behaviors Of The Autism Spectrum Explained

The autism spectrum entails a variety of tendencies that could manifest as unexpected behaviors in social situations. These tendencies could include, but are not limited to: the autistic person dominating conversations about themselves and their specially-focused interests without asking about the other person, self-stimulating behaviors such as arm-flapping, rocking their bodies back and forth, hair-twirling, shouting out words and phrases repetitively, walking and pacing in circles within a confined space, standing on their toes, and physically aggressive behaviors toward themselves and others. 

The reason for these tendencies within autistic people is that people on the autism spectrum live with neurological (i.e., their brains)  challenges where their minds process information at an accelerated pace while also becoming flustered to the extent that they self-stimulate to release that tension from the sensory challenges that the mental processing causes. 

That mental processing challenge is why many autistic people arm-flap and rock back and forth; they get overcome with emotion and process that emotion so intensely that the arm-flapping behavior is designed to allow for relief from the racing thoughts. The same can be applied to the other tendencies; when an autistic person shouts out a word that is on their mind, that is a version of self-stimulation because of mental over-processing. 

When an autistic person paces in a circular motion in a confined space, that is their way of processing their deep and racing thoughts. The physically aggressive behaviors, which can manifest as striking themselves and others, is a result of mental over-processing, and while the autistic person can learn to modify that behavior, it takes them time and training to reduce that, along with the other tendencies. 

Even if these tendencies are meant to provide mental relief, autistic people can still be very intelligent, including the arm-flapping and the other behaviors. It is important to note that self-stimulation and its various manifestations are not indicators that the autistic person is intellectually disabled, as has been presumed in my lifetime. The self-stimulation is meant for sensory relief from racing thoughts and mental processing. 

As an autistic person, my tendencies manifested noticeably as a youth, though I learned to be self-aware and modify those tendencies in the appropriate times and places. I arm-flapped constantly as a child, both publicly and privately. Privacy was an appropriate time for me to arm-flap; however, the public was not always, though I did not recognize that aspect at the time, and there were reactions from strangers to the arm-flapping, and not very nice reactions. 

I also twirled my hair (I still twirl my hair, but it has improved), I walked and paced in circles until (negative) feedback caused me to modify that, and I occasionally repeat words and phrases depending on the day and situation. I used to stand on my toes as a child, but not as an adult, and I very briefly engaged in physically aggressive behaviors toward myself, but not toward others at any point. Fortunately, I worked through those physically aggressive behaviors toward myself, since those tendencies are unpleasant to deal with. 

Those tendencies could range in pervasiveness from mild to moderate to severe, depending on the autistic person’s awareness and ability to self-regulate. I am an example of someone who started as somewhat pervasive, with the arm-flapping and being unaware, until the various resources and training I received taught me to be more aware and recognize when to modify those behaviors and when to allow for them. It all depends on the level of the autism spectrum; some autistic people can be taught, and others, while getting training, are in the position of being pervasive to the degree that their tendencies remain the same throughout their lives. 

As a school student, I witnessed a couple of classmates who are also autistic have their tendencies manifest to both negative and ridiculing reactions from both teachers and neurotypical peers.  One such classmate was during my intermediate school years, as I attended the second junior high school I was part of, which was a school designed for the disabled and students with behavioral challenges. This classmate was a female, and she was my first glimpse into how pervasive autism can be, depending on the person. 

She would shout out words and sentences, very audibly, throughout the schoolday, she would arm-flap with severe intensity, she became physically aggressive (e.g., striking, hair-pulling) to my teacher and classmates at random times, and she would take my water bottle from my backpack and run out of the backdoor of the classroom to toss the water onto the outside grass. She found that habit stimulating and fun for her sensory processing, albeit she did not recognize that it was improper to me since those water bottles did not belong to her. 

I knew this classmate nearly 20 years ago now, and I hope she has made some progress since then. My neurotypical peers were relentless in their mockery of this classmate throughout my time in that school since they had behavioral challenges without being autistic. One such cruel remark from a neurotypical classmate, due to a lack of understanding, was that this female autistic peer “should be in a class for the ‘r’ word.” Since I was being described the same way at the time, which was false, that cruel choice of words hurt me to hear, even if that classmate was not talking about me there. 

Another peer and classmate of mine from high school, a male in this case, who is autistic, was less pervasive than my middle school female peer because he could communicate with words and hold a conversation on his better days. However, his behavioral issues, due to the autism, included physically aggressive tendencies toward my teacher and other classmates, and considering he was in a mainstream high school (he and I were in a special education classroom in a mainstream school setting), those tendencies were not acceptable there, and he did not learn his lesson when those tendencies manifested. My classmates were cruel to him a lot there as well, since his behaviors were noticeable and he was self-aware, but lacked the self-discipline that I learned to modify those behaviors. I understood better than others what he was dealing with, so I often felt compassion for him. 

I was able to modify my tendencies to not be ridiculed as much as those two classmates, which was difficult to work on and witness. Middle school and high school are very hard to be autistic students throughout, since the autism spectrum is known about, but not understood by all or embraced by a lot, so my middle school and high school tenures were marred by bullying, miscommunications very often, and thusly, a loss of self-esteem at the time. I am one of the fortunate autistic people who had such good resources to learn what those two peers struggled with more than I or others could fathom, who utilized his training to come out of those tendencies an improved individual, and to be able to inform others on how hard that process is. 

It was very unpleasant to witness my peers in a less fortunate situation being mocked and belittled by my neurotypical peers so much, even with the resources available for autistic people to learn. Those scenarios shaped a lot of my beliefs about how the social world operates, that if you behave unexpectedly in public, even if it is due to living with a disability, you will be mistreated and misjudged until you train yourself to be like “everyone else.”

That notion bothers me because even with those tendencies, living on the autism spectrum comes with strengths and good qualities and the resources available, while beneficial for developing awareness of social expectations, often overlook the uniqueness that being autistic offers. In other words, being “different” does not need to be unappealing or lead to being ostracized, but it is often presented that way. 

I hope that, sometime in the future, those tendencies will become more recognized, and the autistic community can escape from the ridicule and teasing that the neurotypical population imposes out of a lack of understanding. Those tendencies exist for autistic people for a reason, and though the unexpected behaviors may not be comfortable to see if someone is unfamiliar, the mockery is a choice people are making to make autistic people feel worse than is ever needed or called for. 

As an autistic man who lived through the belittlement of what has been described for a long time, I hope as strongly as I can that autism awareness evolves to the level that the mockery stops and the embracing begins for the self-esteem and well-being of autistic people everywhere. If that occurs, the autistic community will be better off from that point on.  

References:

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/autism-spectrum-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20352928